Friday, May 10, 2013

The 13th Step

The 13th Step is what it's called when two people from AA have sex. Two lonely fucked up people connecting. Fine by me. I'm a broken robot who wants to feel love. If it wasn't for the stop drinking part I might even go to some meetings for that.

Or the 13th Step is when an AA old timer has sex with a newcomer. Which has a "don't fuck the interns" less cool vibe to it. AA is an emotionally vulnerable place but unless you are over-brimming with confidence being the fresh meat always comes with an insecure feeling. This is why I stay away from new people at jobs. I'm a recovering creep. I take the battery out of my phone after 5 drinks and have to ask a family member for my Facebook password whenever I want to log in. Damn it. Jean, I just want to change my cover photo!

So they named a bar The 13th Step. Naming a drinking establishment after an AA expression. Clever. Inside jokey. Insensitive. Let's go inside.

It's been awhile so I'm a little fuzzy on the details. I remember the waitress was hot. She had glasses. Glasses are beautiful. That just totally does it for me. I write for a Velma Dinkley slash fiction blog. It's called Oh Jinkies! Check it out sometime. I know. Confessions of a Creepy Mind.

They offer cheap drinks. Weekdays 11-8 the entire bar is half priced. That's the kind of deal that will get you in trouble. You know what I mean. You walk out and are blinded by the sun. "Oh! Oh!" Grabbing at your skin like it's burning. You've been watching Trueblood and you're hammered. It's only 3 in the afternoon. Get on the subway, throw Swedish fish at people. Get off after three stops, puke in a garbage can,, get back on before the doors close. 3:15. Car empties out like somebody just took a dump. "What's wrong with you people?!?! Never seen a person throw up before I guess." You get to your stop. Can't make it home. Piss on the steps of your own subway station. Right in front of two old ladies. "Eyes on your own paper grans. What, never seen one that big before?" It's just now 4 in the afternoon.

Hey, it happens. Things get carried away sometimes.

They also have Colossal Nachos. Served on a big platter and stacked 3 feet high. It's enough to split with 5 or 6 other people and, if you don't mind your food served on an upside down garbage can lid, at $30 it's a good value.


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